By Milja Saari-Hembruff
Leaders who know what they stand for are the game-changers. I’m sure you’ve been in the room with leaders who captivate your attention, who you want to be like. They are the ones who lead with confidence and light up a room (or a Zoom meeting).
Not everyone gets there right away – and some never get there.
When I first stepped into a leadership role after 20 years as an individual contributor, I wanted to prove myself. I was trying to say the right things, do the right things, and keep my boss happy. But I didn’t really know what I stood for, and I hadn’t taken the time to think about what truly mattered to me. So when things got hard, I was reactive instead of intentional.
In this blog, I want to talk about something I wish I had figured out much earlier: values.
I’m referring to real, personal values. The important things that show up when you’re making hard calls or deciding what kind of leader you really want to be.
The first step to becoming a good leader is to think about and make an intentional decision on what you stand for.
How My Sabbatical in Laos Changed Everything
In 2019, I took part in a one-month company-sponsored social sabbatical in the country of Laos (in Southeast Asia). It was meant to be a time to give back, but it became a whole lot more.
I worked with an NGO that was doing incredibly impactful work. They were people who cared deeply and led with purpose. That trip changed me. I still think about it every day even 6 years later. That experience made me rethink what success looked like and, more importantly—what kind of leader I wanted to be.
I’ll share more about that journey in a future blog, but what matters today is this: I came home from a month abroad knowing that I couldn’t lead the same way anymore. I needed to lead with more empathy. More clarity. And a lot more humanity.
My True North: Empathy, Transparency, Communication
Since that time, I’ve done the deep work of defining my core values— those values that help me navigate leadership in the real world.
For me, those values are:
- Empathy—because leadership starts with listening.
- Transparency—because people deserve honesty and context.
- Communication—because clarity is kindness, and silence creates confusion.
- Collaboration—because building things together is better.
These values don’t just live in a journal. They shape how I coach, how I parent, how I make decisions—and how I co-founded The LeadWell Collective.
Let’s Get Practical: Do Your Values Inventory
At The LeadWell Collective, we believe in practical learning. So let’s do this together. Here is a list values to reflect on. Read them, take the time to think about them. Listen to your gut (and feel free to Google more if these don’t fit).
Integrity – Doing the right thing, even when it’s uncomfortable.
Communication – Sharing clearly, listening, and keeping people in the loop.
Empathy – Seeing the world through someone else’s eyes.
Transparency – Being open about your intentions and decisions.
Courage – Standing in your beliefs, especially when it’s not popular.
Inclusivity – Making sure every voice matters.
Growth – Committing to learning, unlearning, and evolving.
Accountability – Owning your actions.
Innovation – Staying curious and open to new ideas.
Collaboration – Building better, together.
Compassion – Leading with kindness, especially in hard moments.
Authenticity – Showing up as your real self, not just your role.
Excellence – Doing your best, not being perfect.
Service – Leading with a heart for others.
Justice – Committing to fairness and equity, even when it’s hard.
Pick your top 3–4. Write them down. Stick them on your mirror, your laptop, or the inside of your notebook. Let them be your guide.
Once you have your list take our 30-minute online course called “Why Values are Your Competitive Advantage”. https://weleadwell.thinkific.com/products/courses/discover-core-values
Finally, share what your values are in the LeadWell Community or post on Instagram @leadwell.collective.
The Leadership Lens 